The Accidental Trad Wife

Sleep works

Between midday yesterday, and this morning, I’d slept for 13 hours. It seems to have worked, I woke up and the migraine had gone.

My husband and I started the day, each with a can of Monster in hand, each talking at our phones at the infuriating owl on Duolingo. I’m nailing Italian. I’ve reached level 10, which means I can now say “I need to go to the market for 3 black shirts and 2 new skirts, but only if there is a sale.” This one might actually come in handy. 

My husband went to play something or other on the PlayStation and I started the morning cleaning while watching ‘Don’t Fuck with Cats’. I’ve seen it before, but it has a clear message ‘non scherzare con i gatti’. 

There were lots of WhatsApps going back and forward about going out tonight or tomorrow for my husband’s birthday. I’d offered different options: people can come round and get a takeaway, I’ll make dinner, we can go out. It turned out some of our friends had already made plans. I feel guilty about this, maybe a good Trad Wife would have known what her husband would like and just have organised it, rather than waiting for her husband to decide. 

It’s all worked out though, we’re all free to go to dinner tomorrow night. I still think I could have done something to make it special though.

We got ready and headed out to meet our friends for lunch. 

Naming a non-existent cat

On the way to meet our friends my husband and I discussed names for a cat, that we don’t have, don’t yet plan on adopting, and may not even want. Our ideas differ. I want to call this non-existent cat ‘Lord Portalington III’, my husband wants to call it ‘Booker’. I’m right, and he’ll come around, if we ever do get a cat. 

We met our friends at a local bar, and between us, ordered at least 8 deep fried items. We talked about Disney, trains, work, and learning languages. My friend is on level 19 of Japanese. We used to do a similar job. I never had the brain space to learn other things while working, she can. She’s impressive. We have an affinity of ‘Working class girls, done good.’ With a bit of advice here or there, she’s probably supported me more than she knows.

After lunch we headed back home. We stopped at Tesco on the way as I needed butter, self raising flour, and eggs. My husband said “Please don’t make me a birthday cake.” I said I wasn’t. He said “It looks like it”. He’s right, it does look like it. I planned on baking things, just not a cake. 

I didn’t bake a cake

When we got back, I banned my husband from the kitchen so I could bake. It’s not a cake. Our flat is semi open plan, the kitchen is separated, but doesn’t have a door. I stood at the entrance to the kitchen growling every time he came near. It’s not a cake. I baked for a couple of hours, I’ve bought him some cute containers as part of his birthday present and I wanted to fill them with baked goods. But it’s not a cake. 

I went and sat in the bedroom and watched another murder documentary, this time on the Yorkshire Ripper. I watch a lot of crime documentaries, I’m just interested in the psychology of it. I’m not currently planning on killing anyone. Unless someone disrespects my baking, of course.

What’s next? 

A thought that’s been bouncing around in my head for the last few days is “What’s next?” There’s a week left of this experiment. Then what? I just go back into the corporate world I guess. 

I’m not sure I want that. 

I’ll do it though, I probably have to. I’ve always enjoyed my work, but, is it my passion? I don’t know. I’ve never questioned it before. I loved what I did, genuinely. 

What if I want to open a cafe? What if I want to write? What if I want to be a full time Trad Wife? But, who am I trying to convince, I need to bring money in. I’ll start looking for jobs in a week or so, and work in another big company. And I’ll almost certainly like it. And I’m sure I’ll be good at it. I’m unsure about a lot of things, my abilities at work is one of the few things I don’t doubt. That sounds really arrogant, doesn’t it? 

I’ll keep pondering on what’s next. But for now, I’ll sit in one room watching a murder documentary, while my husband is in another on the PlayStation.

The Trad Wife round up:

Feeling: lost again, more thoughtfully than good lost or bad lost
Secret baked goods eaten without my husband noticing: 4
Crime documentaries watched: 3
What’s next? Hell knows